Addictions have been around long before any of us existed. Information and understanding around addictions have come a long way from just alcohol and drug.
While not undermining these addictions, there are several more that can impact our
worlds and our relationships today. Now in addition to the “traditional” culprits,
we can now add on other categories such as gambling, shopping, social media, sex,
pornography and food.
When someone in a family struggles with some form of addictions the ripple effect
is ever going. It can affect every member of the family and even flow into other
relationships like extended family, work life, and friends. Many addicts come to a
place where nothing matters other than that in which they are addicted to.
Therefore, family and partners will always come second.
If drugs, alcohol or other addictions are a problem for you or your partner, there is
hope. It is often thought that addiction is closely related to some trauma or past
hurt. In therapy and counseling this can also be addressed and healed some the
individual can begin a new healthier lifestyle. For some, addiction can be a long
process to overcome, but through therapy, different tools and techniques can be
learned as a way to make better choices in the future and healthy coping
mechanisms. A solid and healthy support system is the start to recovery.
Often the person, outside of the addict, that is affected the most is the partner. An
addiction takes over a person’s brain, life and motivation. Many addicts begin
missing functions with the family and possibly avoiding family time all together.
Many partners report feeling very lonely as they find themselves coming second to
the others addiction. They may feel betrayed that the addict is letting this
destruction happen without appearing to care of the after effect.
Many individuals that struggle with addictions can also struggle with severe mood
swings that will inevitably affect the relationship. When an addiction takes hold,
all that person wants is the next “hit” of pleasure from the addiction, not from life
or their partner. When addiction is withheld from the addict, mood swings can be
violent, scary and sometimes even psychotic. Physical violence isn’t the only
violence that can be happening within the relationship, it can also be emotional and
mental abuse as well.
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